This is a piece by J.Raymond and it reminded me of you, little sister. I miss you so much.
" I love the way she survived. Survival looked good on her. There were no dark marks under her eyes
maybe on the inside, but I liked the way she looked through them and laughed at life.
She did it gracefully. She'd walk over glass and through fire, but still smiled. And honestly, I'm not interested
in people who haven't lived and died a few times. Who haven't yet had their heart ripped out, or know what it feels
like to lose everything. I trust those people, because they stand for something. I know what she'd been
through. I wanted to thank her for surviving. And I wanted her to know she now had someone willing
to stand with her too."
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| Kiki | Remebering Taye | September 13, 2014 |
| Kiki | The Power of soft cheeks and parted lips/ I miss u | September 2, 2014 |
(Dear Taye, mom wanted me to type in part of my eulogy to you, we miss you more than you could ever imagine. I'm back at Bowdoin. I wish you were close by me at Proctor. Rest in peace.)
Sometimes I would wake-up early and watch my sister sleep. One cheek would gently rest on the mattress and the other slightly collapsed over the side crease of her mouth. Her lips would be partly parted, and her hair looked like she was in some wild year long adventure.
Sometimes I couldn't find her because she would be so buried underneath her blankets and pillows. Eventually, I would find her though, small pink lips peeking out, usually at the foot of her bed. A small mound moving softly, up and down. A little animal. Even this year she had those soft cheeks, and parted lips as she slept. My little animal.
Taye had this leopard helmet when she was little, and I remember telling the black cat ears on the helmet to ski through the trees before me on a powder day in Jackson Hole. I thought, if she fell, I could piece her back together. I watched the black tail on her helmet bounce up and down, until the tail did not go back down, but rather disappeared behind a huge mound of snow. I skied around the mound of snow to find a small leopard helmet with reflective goggles crumpled in the snow below a boulder twice my height. I picked her up, put her skis on and found her buried poles. Of course, my sister told my parents I forced her to go in front of me. My parents jokingly thought I was using her as the Guienea pig. No one understood, I only wanted to protect her. But the little sister always wins.
My sister was the most powerful person I knew. She could wield influence over me like an alpa dog to the omega dog. It did agitate me to no end.
Taye would wait until I finished the last bite of dessert before she would start eating hers...although, sometimes she would reward my jealousy with half of what she was eating.
She could punish me right in front of our parents by whistling through her teeth at a particular ocave that my parents couldn't hear.
On Christmas, she would wait until everyone else had opened their Christmas gifts, so she could have her own private Christmas with an audience.
And she would go, "MOMMY!" in a baby voice and spread her arms wide so that my mom would embrace her and kiss her on the forehead. She would stare and smile mockingly at me.
Taye was the most affectionate child, always wanting a hug. Always pointing out to my mom gifts she thought I would like. Buying little gadgets for me with her own little coin purse. Even making me a #1 Sister red baseball cap with permanent marker.
Taye would beg me to play with her. I remember in Jackson Hole she would ask if I wanted to go sledding with her, and then she'd persuade me by saying she would pull the sled uphill, with me in it!
Even if, I didn't hang out with her, she figured out ways to entertain herself. In the winter, I would walk outside only to bump into life-size snow seals staring at me. Or there was one time in the summer, on the North Shore of Oahu, she she said, "please come swimming with me." I said, "No", because I was studying for ACT's. After begging me until she was blue in the face, Taye wandered off. When I first looked up, she was digging a hole in the sand. Twenty-five pages later, I look up to see her buried chest deep in the hole!
Sometimes her way of entertainment would find her in situations where she ended up in the hospital with a dog leash hanging from her lower lip.
Taye was the kind of person who always seemed to make noise. Even when you would think there's nothing possible to make noise with, she would find something. On a particular afternoon driving home from school, my mom and I were talking, and there was this clicking sound in the back of the car, but it didn't phase me much as noises like this from Taye were like listening to someone breathe. A few seconds later, we hear a wailing coming from the backseat, and I turned around to find my sister's dog leash firmly clapsed to her bottom lip. My mom started laughing, and Taye started laughing too, but her eyes produced tears as she began to panic. We went straight to the doctor's office, and the nurses there were so shocked they couldn't keep a straight face. They mananged to unclasp Taye's bleeding lip from the leash, and at that profound moment, I reliazed my sister really was a kind of animal. Years later we would laugh about this. She had this power to make me really feel happiness.
In a writing journal, I'm sure she never wanted me to see, she wrote about happiness in a way that I could only wish of articulating. I remember watching her face as she rounded the corner in a crit ' race for her last lap. The finish line. I often hope she felt this in her last moments too.
(Taye's essay on Passionate & Alive):
"When you feel like a symphony is bursting through your chest and sprinting into your veins. Every inhale feels like a crisp gust of wind. Colors swirl and the wind skimming through your lungs and burst back out when you exhale: fireworks.
You get a warm shiver, feeling light, weightless all the the hairs on your body stand up, an urge to leap on the tips of your toes fills you with eccentric energy.
This feeling is the closest sensation to feeling alive I can imagine. Everything feels like an orchestra of dancing colors and your body feels light and agile, colors of the sun rays hurl down from the sky like crashing ocean waves and it feels so right.
When you realize you've been humming quite loudly but didn't hear yourself because the colors around you were louder than your songs.
Outside long grasses ripple, water, feeling like you're walking across a lake, but a meadow. Or anything, climb onto the top of a large granite boulder between the line of dry tundra and flourishing tundra, howl like a mad man the sensation of a proud lion. No one else hears, but your own voice reverberates shaking like an alarm clock inside your head. Standing underneath infinity the colors feel like a rush of cold water but wraps around you, makes you feel lifted up by the colors."
The finish line. Like everything else, except maybe eating dessert and opening presents, my sister had to be first. She was unconventional, and complicated to the core in ways that after 16 years of being intertwined in each other's puppy cuddles I couldn't even begin to comprehend. We jumped around each other playfully, hurting feelings, bouncing off laughs in our heads, & protecting one another. I hope Taye knows that I will never forget the moments after arguments with my parents when she would quietly enter my room with a glass of water and set it on my nightstand. She made me strong. She gave me power.
I love you Taye. My accomplishments and failures are yours as well. Just stay with me. Just wait for me. And rest in peace with soft cheeks and parted lips.
Love Forever your big sister, Kiki
Sometimes I would wake-up early and watch my sister sleep. One cheek would gently rest on the mattress and the other slightly collapsed over the side crease of her mouth. Her lips would be partly parted, and her hair looked like she was in some wild year long adventure.
Sometimes I couldn't find her because she would be so buried underneath her blankets and pillows. Eventually, I would find her though, small pink lips peeking out, usually at the foot of her bed. A small mound moving softly, up and down. A little animal. Even this year she had those soft cheeks, and parted lips as she slept. My little animal.
Taye had this leopard helmet when she was little, and I remember telling the black cat ears on the helmet to ski through the trees before me on a powder day in Jackson Hole. I thought, if she fell, I could piece her back together. I watched the black tail on her helmet bounce up and down, until the tail did not go back down, but rather disappeared behind a huge mound of snow. I skied around the mound of snow to find a small leopard helmet with reflective goggles crumpled in the snow below a boulder twice my height. I picked her up, put her skis on and found her buried poles. Of course, my sister told my parents I forced her to go in front of me. My parents jokingly thought I was using her as the Guienea pig. No one understood, I only wanted to protect her. But the little sister always wins.
My sister was the most powerful person I knew. She could wield influence over me like an alpa dog to the omega dog. It did agitate me to no end.
Taye would wait until I finished the last bite of dessert before she would start eating hers...although, sometimes she would reward my jealousy with half of what she was eating.
She could punish me right in front of our parents by whistling through her teeth at a particular ocave that my parents couldn't hear.
On Christmas, she would wait until everyone else had opened their Christmas gifts, so she could have her own private Christmas with an audience.
And she would go, "MOMMY!" in a baby voice and spread her arms wide so that my mom would embrace her and kiss her on the forehead. She would stare and smile mockingly at me.
Taye was the most affectionate child, always wanting a hug. Always pointing out to my mom gifts she thought I would like. Buying little gadgets for me with her own little coin purse. Even making me a #1 Sister red baseball cap with permanent marker.
Taye would beg me to play with her. I remember in Jackson Hole she would ask if I wanted to go sledding with her, and then she'd persuade me by saying she would pull the sled uphill, with me in it!
Even if, I didn't hang out with her, she figured out ways to entertain herself. In the winter, I would walk outside only to bump into life-size snow seals staring at me. Or there was one time in the summer, on the North Shore of Oahu, she she said, "please come swimming with me." I said, "No", because I was studying for ACT's. After begging me until she was blue in the face, Taye wandered off. When I first looked up, she was digging a hole in the sand. Twenty-five pages later, I look up to see her buried chest deep in the hole!
Sometimes her way of entertainment would find her in situations where she ended up in the hospital with a dog leash hanging from her lower lip.
Taye was the kind of person who always seemed to make noise. Even when you would think there's nothing possible to make noise with, she would find something. On a particular afternoon driving home from school, my mom and I were talking, and there was this clicking sound in the back of the car, but it didn't phase me much as noises like this from Taye were like listening to someone breathe. A few seconds later, we hear a wailing coming from the backseat, and I turned around to find my sister's dog leash firmly clapsed to her bottom lip. My mom started laughing, and Taye started laughing too, but her eyes produced tears as she began to panic. We went straight to the doctor's office, and the nurses there were so shocked they couldn't keep a straight face. They mananged to unclasp Taye's bleeding lip from the leash, and at that profound moment, I reliazed my sister really was a kind of animal. Years later we would laugh about this. She had this power to make me really feel happiness.
In a writing journal, I'm sure she never wanted me to see, she wrote about happiness in a way that I could only wish of articulating. I remember watching her face as she rounded the corner in a crit ' race for her last lap. The finish line. I often hope she felt this in her last moments too.
(Taye's essay on Passionate & Alive):
"When you feel like a symphony is bursting through your chest and sprinting into your veins. Every inhale feels like a crisp gust of wind. Colors swirl and the wind skimming through your lungs and burst back out when you exhale: fireworks.
You get a warm shiver, feeling light, weightless all the the hairs on your body stand up, an urge to leap on the tips of your toes fills you with eccentric energy.
This feeling is the closest sensation to feeling alive I can imagine. Everything feels like an orchestra of dancing colors and your body feels light and agile, colors of the sun rays hurl down from the sky like crashing ocean waves and it feels so right.
When you realize you've been humming quite loudly but didn't hear yourself because the colors around you were louder than your songs.
Outside long grasses ripple, water, feeling like you're walking across a lake, but a meadow. Or anything, climb onto the top of a large granite boulder between the line of dry tundra and flourishing tundra, howl like a mad man the sensation of a proud lion. No one else hears, but your own voice reverberates shaking like an alarm clock inside your head. Standing underneath infinity the colors feel like a rush of cold water but wraps around you, makes you feel lifted up by the colors."
The finish line. Like everything else, except maybe eating dessert and opening presents, my sister had to be first. She was unconventional, and complicated to the core in ways that after 16 years of being intertwined in each other's puppy cuddles I couldn't even begin to comprehend. We jumped around each other playfully, hurting feelings, bouncing off laughs in our heads, & protecting one another. I hope Taye knows that I will never forget the moments after arguments with my parents when she would quietly enter my room with a glass of water and set it on my nightstand. She made me strong. She gave me power.
I love you Taye. My accomplishments and failures are yours as well. Just stay with me. Just wait for me. And rest in peace with soft cheeks and parted lips.
Love Forever your big sister, Kiki
| Sean Kent | Early Years | September 1, 2014 |
In truth I remember very little about kindergarten and first grade; I struggle to recall the faces of my teachers, my classmates, and the things I learned in those years. Taye is an exception. I have fond memories of playing with her and Cathal at recess. In particular, I remember meeting around a big tree on the High Lakes playground and playing Pokémon. I don’t think any of us had ever played Pokémon – the videogame or the card game – but we knew a few characters and loved to make up stories with them.
| Melissa Kent | First years in Bend | August 31, 2014 |
Dear Taye -Most of my memories of you are from your early years at High Lakes Elementary in Bend. I remember you being a precoscious young girl when I first met you in Mrs. Alexander's class in Kindergarten. You and Sean were classmates and both of you had just moved to Bend. As I recall, even at a young age, you were never afraid to voice your opinion. I think Sean found your confidence admirable and immediately took a liking to you. You were one of the few classmates Sean wanted to play with outside of school. I particularly remember your ever changing hairstyles - headband, pigtails and variations on each. And you definitely had your own unique sense of clothing style. Usually bright colors! Your independent spirit was evident, even at age 5. I have attached a picture of you with your 1st grade class during a celebration of Fairytales. I think even in this picture you stand out from the crowd. That's how I remember you as a young girl.
While I know you and Sean also spent 6th grade together at Seven Peaks, I wasn't around the classroom enough to have clear memories of you. However, I clearly remember seeing you at The Great Nordeen in 2013. It was the first and only time I have done the race and I remember seeing you at the starting line. By then, I knew you were an avid nordic skier and a rising cyclist - two of my favorite activities. I always enjoyed learning of your various successes and challenges in nordic skiing and cycling from your mom. I don't know many young girls interested in clycling, so I found your dedication to that sport particularly exciting.
Taye, I think of you often. Although I sometimes wonder where your interest and talents could have taken you, I also appreciate and celebrate all you accomplished in your life here with us. Thank you for your spirit and passion. May we all learn from you.
Love to you and your family,
Melissa Kent
| Barb | Missed the bus again! | August 28, 2014 |
I was reading one of the other posts about Taye missing the MBSEF bus and it made me chuckle. Just this last winter Brett, Lainey and I were pulling out of the Bachelor parking lot and out of the corner of my eye I see this girl frantically waving at us with her thumb stuck out. I slammed on the brakes when I saw it was Taye, scolded her for attempting to hitchhike and crammed her and all her gear into the Audi to cart her down the hill. The whole time I kept asking if we should call you to let you know that she was okay, but Taye insisted that you knew she was alright!
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